Vital Topics: Social Work & Film
by SaraKay Smullens, MSW, LCSW, DCSW, CGP, CFLE, BCD
FX’s Dying for Sex, produced by 20th Television, is a comedy-drama inspired by the true story of Nikki Boyer’s closest friend, Molly Kochan, as she faced cancer and death. It is based on the 2021 Wondery podcast, hosted by Boyer and with the same name as the TV series, which won the coveted Inaugural Ambie Award for best podcast of the year. The 8-episode FX Series (each 30 minutes) was released on April 4, 2025, on Hulu. It was written and co-created by Kim Rosenstock and Elizabeth Meriwether, who also served as executive producers along with Katherine Pope; Kathy Ciric; Wondery’s Hernan Lopez, Jen Sargent, Marshall Lewy, and Aaron Hart; Michelle Williams; Nikki Boyer; Shannon Murphy; and Leslye Headland.
Script Flow and Examination, With Sensitivity to Spoilers
Please note: We know the protagonist is going to die from the get-go, but the backdrop—“detailed whys”—marking painful personal frustrations that are revealed as the series progresses, will be addressed with care, avoiding as many spoilers as possible.
Dying for Sex holds two primary themes—the extraordinary friendship shared by two women, and the journey toward death viewed as progression toward life’s extraordinary possibilities. The superb talent of co-creators Elizabeth Meriwether and Kim Rosenstock in bringing the podcast story to film life is front and center of this work, as are genius performances. A full description of devoted cast and crew can be found at https://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/dying-for-sex/cast.
The indomitable Michelle Williams plays Molly Kochan (her real name). With the assistance of Wondery, a highly successful podcast studio detailed later, Molly’s beloved, devoted friend, Nikki Boyer (also her real name in the series), brought honesty and authenticity to the podcast, revealing open discussions about nearly all of Kochan’s almost 200 sexual experiences in the final years of her life, in part motivated by increased libido resulting from her prescribed medications. Six podcast episodes were released in 2020 following Molly’s death at the age of 45.
Nikki, who sees Molly through her healing, fulfilling, captivating, and at times humorous journey to death, is played in the TV series by the extraordinary talent, Jenny Slate. Nikki, an actress totally disorganized in all aspects of her life, evolves in ways that will leave you breathless. As time passes, we bear witness as care for Molly precedes all in Nikki’s life, including a man she loves deeply and a job that is an essential stepping stone. In chilling truth, as Molly’s illness progresses, Nikki speaks of gratitude that her blood has stained most of Nikki’s clothing; this allows them to remain together.
We first meet Molly and her husband Steve (Jay Duplass) in their therapist’s office. Molly, healthy for five years, believing metastatic breast cancer is behind them both, shares her frustration that Steve is disinterested in sex. She takes a call from her doctor, played with aplomb by David Rasche: the pain in her hip reveals that Molly’s cancer has returned and chemo must begin immediately. At home with Steve, desperate to cling to life, Molly attempts passionate sex. But Steve pulls away, expressing a truth I have seen many times. Once a woman has cancer, she loses all sexual appeal to her partner. Steve sublimates with excessive nurturing, the opposite of what Molly craves.
Molly has never experienced orgasm with Steve or any man. Before she dies, she is determined to make this experience part of her life. Marital disappointment such as Molly’s is a persistent therapy theme, one that can be successfully addressed. For many complicated reasons, once married, as well as when a wife becomes a mother, many lose interest in sex, as well as begin to fear the intense intimacy it offers and vulnerabilities it exposes. In the series, Molly is adamant. Her marriage is over. She leaves Steve. All aspects of her care will depend on Nikki.
Social Work Front and Center
Now, here are two descriptions that will mean a great deal to you! When have you viewed a superb screening in which a social worker is presented in full dimension, front and center, in script formulation? The last I can remember is Neil Brock, played by George C. Scott in the 1963-64 TV series, East Side/West Side, which accurately examined Scott’s Neil Brock amidst the social, political, and economic chaos of the early pivotal 1960s. In Dying, you meet Sonya (she/her), a palliative care trans social worker and essential member of the team caring for Molly. Sonya is played by Esco Jouley, destined for stardom, who in personal life identifies as nonbinary and trans, using they/them as pronouns. Sonya encourages Molly’s dream to experience orgasm with a man, believing sexual adventures will contribute to her goal, cheering her on in various ways, including BDSM. As an early step in this progression, we watch as Molly uses a vibrator to discover how to best pleasure herself.
In the joy of riches, another professional introduced in the series also seems like a social worker, although she is not given this title. Hospice worker Amy (played by Paula Pell) tells Molly what to expect from her body when it can no longer serve her. In its final, merciful act, culminating in the universal, inextricable link between life and death, Molly’s body will release her. She will lose all control, as, once she was able to face her demons, she was finally able to give up control to achieve orgasm in precisely the way she longed for. In the words of Nikki Boyer, “Molly wanted to fall in love, and she did. She fell in love with herself.”
Crash Course: What Is Wondery? Why Did I Want To Learn and Share?
When I realized that podcasts, not books, now provide the primary source for film making, I knew I had much to learn. Intrigued and captivated by the television series Dying for Sex, and Wondery, a premier “audio first” company that does not greenlight a podcast with TV as a primary consideration, I explored a personal connection to learn more. Wondery’s miniseries podcasts are usually six episodes, each 30 minutes, providing the basis of story structure that might work in TV. According to executive producer Aaron Hart, head of TV/Film at Wondery, whom I interviewed for this review-commentary, “Many of the attributes we look for in a good podcast naturally apply to TV, such as strong characters in a narrative that carries listeners from episode to episode.” Aaron explains further, “When the podcast Dying for Sex was released in 2020, the story connected with many writers vying to adapt. We couldn’t have asked for better stewards to this story than Liz Meriwether (also created The New Girl and The Dropout) and Kim Rosenstock, who brilliantly captured the themes, tone, and friendship of Nikki and Molly, brought in tour de force performances by Michelle Williams and Jenny Slate.”
Full Disclosure
I have known Aaron Hart since his birth. On my first day of class at the University of Pennsylvania School of Social Work (now the School of Social Policy and Practice), I met fellow student Florence Rubenstein, who became an accomplished clinical social worker and lifelong friend. Florence married Peter Hart, founder of DC’s Peter Hart Research, one of our country’s most respected liberal pollsters. Their son, Aaron, grew up surrounded by the extraordinary political insights and savvy of his father and the compassion and brilliance of his mother.
In his role as head of TV/Film at Wondery, Aaron spearheads the development of Wondery's podcasts into film and TV series. I’m not looking through rose colored glasses when I share that, under his leadership, Wondery has established itself as the preeminent force in podcast-to-TV adaptations, producing seven acclaimed limited television series over the last four years, including The Shrink Next Door, We Crashed, and Dr. Death. And now, Dying for Sex. I asked Aaron if, considering his past, a script emphasizing the devoted work of two social work professionals (one identified, one not) held special appeal. Although he did not respond directly, to me the proof is in the pudding of a mesmerizing series, highlighting the devoted relationships of two consummate professionals, who each echo unwavering life to death commitment.
SaraKay Smullens' (MSW, LCSW, BCD) best selling book Burnout and Self-Care in Social Work, Edition 2 (NASW Press, 2021) grew from her researched award winning article in The New Social Worker, “What I Wish I Had Known.” SaraKay has worked with women enduring domestic violence for more than 30 years, which led to her identification of invisible cycles of emotional abuse, always part of sexual and physical violence, but deserving their own codification. In 1995, with the support of the Philadelphia District Attorney’s office, she initiated the Sabbath of Domestic Peace Coalition, a diverse, multicultural bonding of religious leaders, the domestic violence community, social workers, physicians, attorneys, volunteers, and law enforcement officials who identified clergy as "a missing link" in addressing the complexities of the virulent epidemic of domestic violence, which prayer alone could not solve. The Coalition held trainings for clergy and parishioners throughout Philadelphia and surrounding areas. Its yearly non-denominational prayer service was attended by hundreds. After several years, the SDP Coalition was able to disband as individual faith communities and houses of worship incorporated their mission.