by Erlene Grise-Owens, EdD, LCSW, MSW, MRE, lead co-editor of The A-to-Z Self-Care Handbook for Social Workers and Other Helping Professionals
A student’s critical incident, shared in a social work field placement seminar I was teaching, convinced me that self-care is an essential aspect of professional practice. This incident crystallized my conviction that we, as educators, were negligent, and thus, unethical if we sent people into the field without competence in tending to their own well-being.
After about two decades of studying, practicing, and promoting self-care, that conviction remains steadfast. And, my initial understanding of self-care has changed significantly. In the spirit of iconic Oprah’s “What I know for sure…” columns, in my next two blog posts, I’ll share What I Know for Sure About Self-Care, And…I’m still learning.
Self-care is about power, and it’s up to me to (re)claim mine.
Nobody is coming to save me. In every circumstance, it’s me. I have agency. Believe me. Like most of you, I’ve navigated incredibly toxic environments across my career. Emphatically, I’m not “victim-blaming.” Collective care is integral to self-care. Systemic change and organizational accountability are crucial! However, if I wait for “someone” to make changes, I get more demoralized, disempowered, and disengaged. The more I externalize my well-being, the less influence I have on it. It’s all about power.
And, it’s up to me to (re)claim my power. Alice Walker said, “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” We—especially in helping professions—concede power in myriad ways. One of the most insidious ways is through internalizing the message that we must be selfless. Thus, self-care is viewed as selfish.
To counter that dangerous, disempowering message, we must reclaim our power-fullness. Selflessness is simply a form of powerlessness. We must reframe self-care as self-full, not selfish. Systemically, in taking care of ourselves, we have more power to sustain ourselves for the complex work of systemic change, and we bring healthier selves to the collective. It’s not either/or; it’s both/and: Power-Full.
Self-care is a professional ethical responsibility and a personal human right.
When I first started this self-care path, I saw self-care as an add-on activity—something to do after work to recover from work. Also, self-care was done to perform better in our professional roles. Now, I know it’s also how we work, as part of a full life as a human being.
And, so, self-care must be conceptualized in a wholistic way. That is, whilst we need to put healthy boundaries around work, it’s not about “work-life balance.” That dichotomy is actually a harmful misnomer. We cannot separate personal from professional or work from life—and sequester self-care. We must develop competence in professional self-care. Likewise, work is part of full life; we don’t work and then live.
Self-care is about being human. Thus, self-care is integral in all aspects of life, including work. Emphatically, we don’t have to selflessly exhaust ourselves to deserve self-care. We simply and powerfully must claim self-care as a human right, professionally and personally.
Self-care gets easier, and it remains a struggle.
After these many years, I can attest that my diligent investment in self-care has exponentially positive effects. I’m much healthier, content, and competent because of it. Self-care habits sustain my well-being. I witness similar journeys for others. Likewise, my dedicated study of self-care has evolved into significant expertise. My professional mission of promoting self-care as essential includes contributing to the knowledge base and developing accessible, substantive resources—such as this blog forum. This investment deepens and reinforces my own self-care.
And, I’ve learned to recognize that I’ll always struggle with my self-care. Compassionately, I must acknowledge the struggle in order to effectively address it. Consistently, I must feed my self-care through ongoing attention and learning. I’m grateful for deepened competence in self-care, as well as my ability and opportunity to contribute to a self-care movement. Concomitantly, a growth mindset propels me to continuously seek resources, solidify progress, and be open to change.
This entry describes three aspects of what I know for sure about self-care. I’ll share more in my next post. And, I’m still learning. Hopefully, you are, too. As we accompany each other on this ongoing journey, please, share what you know for sure about self-care…and what you’re learning.
Peace, Love, & Self-Care
Erlene
Erlene Grise-Owens, EdD, LCSW, MSW, MRE, is a Partner in The Wellness Group, ETC. This LLC provides evaluation, training, and consultation for organizational wellness and practitioner well-being. Dr. Grise-Owens is lead editor of The A-to-Z Self-Care Handbook for Social Workers and Other Helping Professionals. As a former faculty member and graduate program director, she and a small (but mighty!) group of colleagues implemented an initiative to promote self-care as part of the social work education curriculum. Previously, she served in clinical and administrative roles. She has experience with navigating toxicity and dysfunction, up-close and personal! Likewise, as an educator, she saw students enter the field and quickly burn out. As a dedicated social worker, she believes the well-being of practitioners is a matter of social justice and human rights. Thus, she is on a mission to promote self-care and wellness!