Self-Care Is Not Always Instagrammable

by Kristin Carpenter, LCSW-S

     Anyone who has been on Instagram lately knows that “Self-Care” is having a moment. Images of people eating cupcakes, going on beautiful vacations, and inspirational sentences telling us to “just let go” are abundant on my social media feed. Sometimes I feel really inspired by what people are sharing, and sometimes I feel the opposite.

     I have been a professional social worker for 15 years now. I have worked with people with severe mental illnesses, children with autism, and college students who have seen more tragedy and trauma than most people twice their age. There are days when I wish eating a cupcake or taking a nap would help me manage the burnout and secondary trauma symptoms that have built up over a decade and a half of this work. But in the past year, I have had to get real with myself about burnout. I am committed to social work for the long haul, and if I am going to remain in this field for the next 20 years, I have to really start taking care of myself.

     Real self-care is not necessarily Instagrammable. No one wants to see pictures of me getting regular blood work to monitor a chronic illness, but that is some of the best self-care I can do. I started seeing an orthopedic massage therapist a year ago when I could no longer move my neck. Fifteen years of emotional and physical stress of social work and parenting had done a number on my body. This is not the fun massage with flowers and happy thoughts. This is work, and it’s not pretty.

     Self-care also looks like taking 10 minutes away from my desk and walking, even when I feel guilty for leaving my office and not being always available for my clients. It means eating a healthy breakfast and taking time for lunch, even though I work in a culture that does not prioritize those things and instead rewards people for over-working. I also started an Etsy shop and make fun items, some with a social work theme, as crafting has been a wonderful creative outlet for me. 

     If we are going to persist in this career, we MUST learn how to truly take care of ourselves as much as we take care of our clients. We lose too many amazing people to burnout in this career, and we need to make teaching social workers about burnout prevention a priority. I am partnering with a colleague in my city to teach about burnout to social service and mental health providers using applied improvisation techniques. Our goal is to teach people techniques for developing the skills to prevent burnout and hopefully keep more wonderful clinicians in this field for years to come. 

Kristin Carpenter is an LCSW-Supervisor in Cypress, TX (Houston adjacent). She works full time at a large dropout prevention educational nonprofit where she provides direct services to community college students. She also has a small crafting business and is working on starting a private practice.