Insisting on a New "R" Word: Respect

by Hannah Brewer

     In the last several months, I have used my voice in a different way than I ever have before. In December, I experienced what I first believed was hate. However, I now understand that this situation happened because of misinformation and misunderstanding. In a casual setting at my dorm, I heard the word “retarded” used as a joke in conversation, and I kindly asked that next time the person choose a different word, just like I have asked since I was a little girl. Typically, there are a few questions that lead to good conversation or just a little seed planted in someone’s mind for the next time they think about that word and the people it affects. This time, my peers quickly disagreed with me. This group of male students insisted that their words essentially have no meaning and cannot hurt another person. All the while, the confrontation had an undertone of “I can’t believe a woman is standing up against a man’s word.”

     This scene is important, because in the days to follow, I was told we have to “pick our battles” and “not every hill is a hill to die on” by other peers. These words came from people with good intentions, but to me the attempt at consolation felt like putting a Band-Aid over the site of a heart transplant. We must stop pretending these temporary balms of “I’m sorry that happened” are enough to change the way our society views and treats fellow human beings. While the message I was voicing in that confrontation was multifaceted, at the end of the day it boils down to the dignity and worth of individuals, a core value of social work. As I dive into this major, I am continually reaffirmed that I am working toward doing important and much needed work for our world. Hopefully, one day my children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren will grow up in a world that is just a little bit better because of the work that social workers are doing today - a world where the worth of another person is never questioned.

     My choice to see where social work takes me as a career is something that I hope will influence my kids the way my mom has influenced me. Because of her, this core value of recognizing and acting according to the dignity and worth of a person is something that was rooted in me early in life. She is the Executive Director of the Down Syndrome Association of Central Kentucky, and I truly can’t recall a time when she wasn’t devoting herself to promoting the capabilities of others and enriching our community by striving toward inclusivity for all. My sister Emily was born with Down Syndrome, so you can imagine how much that confrontation back in December meant to me and my family. When people remarked, "You have to pick your battles,” I realized just how strongly I feel about fighting for the dignity of someone else. I will always pick that battle.

     This is not to say that I am perfect, but this core value among the many of social work intertwines with my personal beliefs and encourages me to keep working toward treating others with respect always being in the forefront of my mind. On a larger scale, I will keep working toward a society and a world where it is not such a profound idea to promote inclusivity, equality, and worth of all people regardless of our differences. After all, my sister and my mom have instilled in me the belief that we all have much more in common than we have differences. That belief allowed me to be the person who looked in the eyes of my peers who did not yet understand and still push on with love until the day they do.

     That night, my heart felt broken for the world. I allowed myself that time to feel the hurt. However, when I woke up in the morning, I made a conscious decision to love those peers. Reflecting back now, that was the social work value of the dignity and worth of other people sprouting in me, and I plan to spend my life ensuring this belief is always in bloom.

Hannah Brewer is an undergraduate student at the University of Kentucky studying social work.