Self-Care A-Z: 4 Self-Care Principles To Reach Your Visionary Goals and Feel Good About It
by Ieisha Beasley, DSW, LCSW
I’m on a self-care journey of revisioning. Here’s my story and an invitation to join me.
Vision Boards: Yay or Nay?
If you haven’t started your new year vision board, you’ve probably pondered on it, set substantial goals, and envisioned what you want to accomplish. Vision boards provide a visual space to transfer ideas and goals from thought to action. Those engaging in this expressive activity feel motivated, organized, and prepared. Vision boards promote “daily encouragement” and “positive reinforcement.”
As someone esthetically inspired, I became intentional with vision boards a few years ago. I, too, wanted my dreams to become reality. I crafted artsy and meaningful ways to capture my personal and professional goals. I referred to my vision board, proudly displayed in my office, for inspiration and accountability.
Vision boards proved effective for me! For several years, I was living my dreams, crushing my personal goals, and thriving in my career. I accomplished almost everything on my vision board and received much praise.
However, I was unhappy, exhausted, uncertain, overwhelmed, and silent. That’s right. Goal achievement was exciting, but the way I felt was confounding.
Re-Visioning With Self-Care
By the end of 2020, COVID-19 had made its mark. I worked full-time in health care and was a full-time doctoral student. With the encouragement of my incredible mentor, I did a self-care assessment of areas in my life that needed “balance.”
This assessment was transformative. It propelled me to the realization that self-care is a lifestyle. Until this moment, I was convinced I was practicing “effective” self-care! However, I merely used self-care as a luxury, a pamper session, the latest item acquisition. True self-care—as this ongoing Self-Care, A-Z forum emphasizes—is more than an addendum, an afterthought, and a PRN activity.
Therefore, my next year didn’t commence with a vision board. Instead, I dedicated generous time to discerning my definition of self-care as a way of living, in mandatory partnership with my goals.
How It’s Going
Self-care is how I show up in all spaces as my authentic self to do what I enjoy, most of the time, with adaptive skills to manage what brings discomfort. It’s a lifestyle that aligns with my goals and is not secondary to them. It governs my interactions with others and allows me to lead with kindness and yet, amplify my voice and set boundaries in how I manage these interactions within my capacity. This definition and action-oriented implementation has created freedom, joy, peace—while I continue to achieve my goals.
As we’re indoctrinated to set goals, we must also embed self-care to reap true satisfaction in our achievements. The two are inextricable; both must be approached with the same regard. When we treat self-care as a lifestyle and with equal importance as goal setting, we emphasize its impact.
4 Self-Care Principles To Reach Visionary Goals and Feel Good About It
- Fulfillment: Identify a hobby, interest, or passion outside daily work duties. Lean into this activity, without compromising the time doing so or its value in your life. I’m fulfilled when I garden, decorate, host gatherings, laugh, travel, cook, and pamper myself.
- Purpose: Dedicate time to reflect on your life experiences, negative and positive. Consider the meaning of those experiences and all connected thoughts and emotions. Hold on to and incorporate the good experiences, as much as possible.
- Skillful choices: Skillful choices are coping strategies that are safe, adaptive, and helpful. This approach helps to focus on what you can control, accept what you can’t control, and encourage self-advocacy and self-permission. My go-to skills include quiet time, journaling, writing down my needs, expressing my needs, committed bedtime, nourishment, positive self-talk, reading, temporary change of environment, asking for help, using a distraction, and calling a support person.
- Connection: Allow yourself to cultivate relationships that uplift and support you. Connectedness is a basic human need. We need each other. Take time to evaluate whether your connections are empowering or power draining.
Now it’s your turn! Self-care is a lifestyle. Define what this lifestyle means to YOU and incorporate the four principles in your goal-setting. Reach visionary goals and feel good about it.
Dr. Ieisha Beasley is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker based in Louisville, KY. She provides a host of services related to mental and behavioral health and is a part-time instructor with the University of Kentucky, College of Social Work.