Self-Care A-Z: Celebration as Self-Care
by Erlene Grise-Owens, EdD, LCSW, MSW, MRE, lead co-editor of The A-to-Z Self-Care Handbook for Social Workers and Other Helping Professionals
Whether it’s religious and/or cultural traditions, the legacy of a loved one, or progress in our work, celebration is an important aspect of wholistic self-care. Like many facets of self-care, celebration requires intention, integration, and awareness.
With Intention, Life is a Celebration
Certainly, religious and/or cultural traditions provide celebratory opportunities. Because our family (and the world!) has varied cultural traditions, my partner and I honor myriad celebrations. Winter Solstice is a wonderful observance of natural life cycles that brings occasion to celebrate. For several years, we’ve celebrated Jolabokaflod, an Icelandic tradition of gifting books and chocolates, and cozying in for a delectable evening, whilst feeling connected to the broader world. Jolabokaflod aligns with several of our favorite things: books, chocolate, travel, and hygge.
Life events—from birth to death—can be approached with a celebratory spirit. These celebrations can be big deals with lots of planning and people involved, as self-care engages communal connection. Or, celebration can be quiet moments of reflective solitude. Celebrations can be cozy time with loved ones. Just pay attention to opportunities to commemorate, commend, and revel. With intention, special events and ordinary days can be imbued with celebration.
Celebration as Integral to Our Work
Celebration is not just an ancillary activity of our work. Janet L. Finn’s Just Practice framework asserts that celebration is a “core process” in our work. Finn observes that we tend to dwell on the “drudgery of practice,” rather than look for opportunities to celebrate. She emphasizes celebrating progress and learning—not just “winning.” (And, as I put on syllabi: It’s ALL about the learning!) Those who sustain in the work are intentional about (re)claiming the joy in the work—passion, process, and products. Celebratory joy is a form of resistance.
In clinical work, this approach includes integrating celebration as part of the therapeutic process. For instance, when clients meet goals, embrace growth, show progress—Celebrate! In macro work, integrate celebration as routine, such as communal festivities. Celebration includes combining the self-care practice of gratitude. Advocacy includes appreciation. Thank legislators, businesses, and other public entities for positive actions.
Again, a celebratory spirit is integrated, not added. For instance, I often include “Let me know your questions, comments, and celebrations!” in communications. Integrating celebration—especially amidst difficulty and drudgery—re-energizes the work. And, remember self-care celebration can be as simple as pausing to savor a meaningful moment or stopping to rest after an arduous process.
Be (A)ware!: Caveats to Consider
As with all of our self-care, personal awareness is key. Celebrations—particularly religious, cultural, and familial—can be prime time for yucky stuff! Be aware of your boundaries and follow them. Likewise, the lure of consumerism can turn celebrations into onerous obligations: extravagant weddings, ostentatious work events, unaffordable gifts. Know what’s meaningful to you—and what’s painful or simply unnecessary. Focus on the meaningful; avoid or mitigate the negative.
Our expectations and interpretations can make all the difference. If we expect a celebration to magically bring splintered family together, that’s a set-up for disappointment and possibly harm. Also, a key self-care strategy is to be cognizant of the meaning we’re attaching to something. For instance, with COVID restrictions, Tonya anticipates another quiet Christmas at home with her children—rather than her typical dashing around to various relatives, giving gifts she can’t afford, and which aren’t appreciated. Her interpretation of this plan could be that she will be “lonely” and “disappoint” others. Or, she can ascribe a meaning of savoring family time, whilst saving money.
Another misperception of celebration is that it’s only “fun feelings.” Many meaningful celebrations will likely include grief. Acknowledging this reality is crucial to fully engaging in celebration as self-care.
Gretchen Rubin advises that we enhance experiences by anticipating, savoring, expressing, and recalling them. Whether a momentary pause or momentous occasion, celebratory self-care can be deepened by these steps. Anticipate it—the range of feelings and boundaries/adjustments needed. Savor it—be fully present to the experience. Express it—rituals can help with this facet. And, finally, recall it. Pay attention to meanings you’re ascribing and stories you’re telling about celebrations. Construct a self-care story!
As always, let me know if you have questions, comments, or celebrations! 😊
Peace, Love, and Self-Care, Erlene
Dr. Erlene Grise-Owens, EdD, LCSW, MSW, MRE, is a Partner in The Wellness Group, ETC. This LLC provides evaluation, training, and consultation for organizational wellness and practitioner well-being. Dr. Grise-Owens is lead editor of The A-to-Z Self-Care Handbook for Social Workers and Other Helping Professionals. As a former faculty member and graduate program director, she and a small (but mighty!) group of colleagues implemented an initiative to promote self-care as part of the social work education curriculum. Previously, she served in clinical and administrative roles. She has experience with navigating toxicity and dysfunction, up-close and personal! Likewise, as an educator, she saw students enter the field and quickly burn out. As a dedicated social worker, she believes the well-being of practitioners is a matter of social justice and human rights. Thus, she is on a mission to promote self-care and wellness!