Self-Care A-Z: Self-Care During Poopy Times
by Erlene Grise-Owens, EdD, LCSW, MSW, MRE, lead co-editor of The A-to-Z Self-Care Handbook for Social Workers and Other Helping Professionals
“Poopy! Poopy! Poopy!”
A few weeks ago, on a routine walk, I took a tumble and dislocated my elbow. It hurt like h***. In the emergency room, the doctor informed my partner that they’d sedate me and reset my elbow. He explained, “She will feel the pain, but won’t remember it.” Indeed, all I recall is cotton-candy haze. However, my partner, who stood outside the ER room as a team of staff held me down, attested that I definitely felt it. Amusedly, he reported that I vociferously groaned, “Golly! Golly! Golly! Poopy! Poopy! Poopy!”
Dear Reader, those are not my usual expletives.
However, thus began a “poopy” time of discomfort, inconvenience, and a schedule dominated by physical therapy. Previously, when I took another fall and injured my leg, I shared some “wake up fall” lessons. This post builds on those lessons. This experience reinforced for me some particular self-care tips, which I hope will be helpful. After all, Golly! Golly! Golly! We all experience poopy times.
Focus on Good Enough Self-Care
My good enough focus began with getting really basic. List-making is part of my self-care, including daily to-do lists. I get such satisfaction from marking off items.
To give you a sense of my “Good Enough,” during this poopy time, my daily to-do list included things like “Brush Teeth.” Since practically everything took longer and was more challenging, I gave myself “credit” for every thing I did! Good Enough! Check!
Pamper Yourself, But Be Especially Cautious About Pernicious Practices
Soothing self-care is an important form of self-care. Never, ever dismiss it. However, especially during poopy times, we need to be careful about mistaking pernicious practices for self-care. Pernicious practices are things that may feel good in the moment, but have negative consequences for overall wellness.
As I was going to be sedentary and limited, I knew I’d feel better if I avoided alcohol and desserts. Certainly, I pampered myself with professional foot massages, television binges, and other “treats.” But, I identified specific ways to avoid potentially pernicious practices in order to support a positive—albeit, poopy—recovery.
Practice Gratitude!
Gratitude is one of the most central, accessible, and effective aspects of a self-care lifestyle. It’s an intentional, integrated practice—not a superficial fix.
I routinely keep a Gratitude Journal, in some form. As soon as possible, the day of my injury, I intentionally jotted down my gratitude. This long list included that I was still able to use a pen, though not the computer, because the injury was on my non-dominant arm. I was thankful the injuries weren’t worse, nearby neighbors and medical staff were so helpful, and my partner so awesome. (And, Golly! I was thankful for drugs!) This exercise of recording gratitude so soon after the injury focused my mindset.
Emphasize What You CAN Do (Rather Than What You Can NOT Do)
In the spirit of gratitude, I emphasized what this poopy time allowed me to do. As it was winter, I fully embraced the Winter self-care of Rest, Reflect, and Re-Connect.
I gave myself particular permission to rest. And, instead of bemoaning what I couldn’t do, I gave myself “points” for that! Certainly, I was disappointed I couldn’t do commitments, including writing retreats. However, as Stephen King says, “Reading is the creative center of a writer’s life.” So, I re-centered and read even more than usual. Reading (re)connects me in many ways. And, this Poopy Winter phase was time to reconnect with my self—and simply Be.
Allow Yourself a Poopy Pity Party
Self-care, at all times, is about being fully human.
To paraphrase an old song, “It’s my poopy party and I’ll cry if I want to.” I definitely gave myself permission to feel all the feelings. I don’t cry a lot, but, when I do—I gotta say—I’m pretty good at it. After all, it’s a self-care skill.
Take a Poopy Perspective
Finally, remember during poopy times…
This, too, shall pass. 😊
A friend commented soon after my injury, “I know you’ll write a great blog post out of this experience.” So, here it is. If it isn’t great, I hope it it’s not too poopy.
Peace, Love, & Self-Care,
Erlene
Erlene Grise-Owens, EdD, LCSW, MSW, MRE, is a Partner in The Wellness Group, ETC. This LLC provides evaluation, training, and consultation for organizational wellness and practitioner well-being. Dr. Grise-Owens is lead editor of The A-to-Z Self-Care Handbook for Social Workers and Other Helping Professionals. As a former faculty member and graduate program director, she and a small (but mighty!) group of colleagues implemented an initiative to promote self-care as part of the social work education curriculum. Previously, she served in clinical and administrative roles. She has experience with navigating toxicity and dysfunction, up-close and personal! Likewise, as an educator, she saw students enter the field and quickly burn out. As a dedicated social worker, she believes the well-being of practitioners is a matter of social justice and human rights. Thus, she is on a mission to promote self-care and wellness!