by Monique Saastamoinen, LMSW, MSW
Monique Saastamoinen
Monique Saastamoinen, LMSW, with her father, Roscoe S. Robinson, at her master's graduation. "Breaking generational curses, and honoring generational wisdom."
Recently, while at the Society for Social Work Research (SSWR) 2020 conference in Washington, DC, a tidal wave of impostor syndrome swept over me while listening to the presentations and panels of other social work researchers, both established and new. I found myself googling terms and acronyms to try and keep up with the conversations, and in the midst of translating technical terms and jargon, self-doubt and self-criticism began to seep in. “What am I doing here? I’m a social worker, not a scholar. I don’t belong here….” My perspective was on autopilot, and my internalized self-critic was at the wheel. But, as social workers often do, a bystander intervened and provided some re-framing of my apologetic self-introduction.
Rapport was built through selective self-disclosure via affirmations of solidarity from social work scholars and practitioners who normalized what I was experiencing as a minoratized person balancing systemic inequities in multiple spaces, family obligations, financial needs, and comparing myself to the status quo. The realities and experiences I had seen as deficits in myself were unquestionable testaments of strength, which became clear after listening to narratives similar to my own. The coffee chats, the end-of-session conversations… it seemed these women were working in tandem at reframing my marginalized identities - even though I didn’t once utter the source of my distress, they knew. They had seen it in their own lives and wrestled in the mud with it. They had lost battles with it, but ultimately came out triumphant and were willing to share their battle strategies, how they made it out alive, and ultimately how they were able to thrive. Professional generational wisdom in helping positions is invaluable. Promoting a genuine appreciation for diversity and intersecting marginalized identities as sources of experience, wisdom, and value is critical not only for our diverse clients, but also for our diverse social workers.
Post-conference, I returned to my community able to pour into the glasses of others I came in contact with, once again. I was reminded of the impact we can have as social workers, and how our seemingly micro-accomplishments can be the catalyst to sparking a chain of events that go beyond the immediate results we can see. I was inspired by the generations of social workers who shared their time, their wisdom, and their strength with a first-year social worker living on the margins. Inspiration is an important ingredient in hope, and hope is vital to doing "social work." Thank you for inspiring courage and self-acceptance, Dr. Gina M. Samuels, Dr. Quenette Walton, Dr. Tyreasa Washington, Dr. Sara Goodwill, Dr. Tuwana T. Wingfield, and all others who hold space for restorative acts of inclusion and justice, both big and small.
Monique Saastamoinen, LMSW, MSW, is a New York State licensed social worker recently relocated to Raleigh, NC, who is trying to practice what she preaches to the children and families she serves in child welfare by living courageously, stepping outside of comfort zones, and learning to trust intuition along the way.