Social Work Leadership: 10 Facts on Why You Should Find a Mentor and What To Expect From the Relationship

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Mentor

by Elizabeth J. Clark, Ph.D., MSW, MPH, and Becky S. Corbett, MSW, ACSW

     You’re finally done with classes and assignments and happy to have that part of your professional development behind you. Now people are suggesting you find a mentor. Is that really necessary? Do you need one? What does a mentor do? How do you find one, anyhow?  

    You don’t have to have a mentor, but most successful people will tell you that mentors have been essential to their careers. The following ten facts may help you better understand mentors and the mentoring process:

    1. A mentoring relationship is focused on you, your development, and your achievement. It is not doing research for a professor or helping someone else complete tasks. Mentoring is not counseling or supervision. It should focus on your career, not on your personal issues or work performance. A mentor’s success should not be linked to your success. Because of this, mentors usually are found outside of your place of employment.  

     2. Mentors do many things, not just give advice. They offer support and professional sponsorship. They can help you with problem-solving and skill building. They may encourage you to confront an issue, try a new approach, or take the next step.

     Someone may recognize your potential and offer to be a mentor. Think carefully before turning down such a generous offer. To become a leader, you must build professional relationships, and you will need both personal and professional support networks. Also, keep in mind that mentoring is frequently short-term and can be focused on a specific aspect of your career. It doesn’t have to be a long-term commitment.

    3. You may have to seek a mentor on your own. This is where networking comes in. Attend professional meetings, educational programs, and community events, and see who has skills that you admire and would like to develop. Do your research, and learn all you can about the professional accomplishments, areas of expertise, and published works of the mentor you would like to approach. Decide on a plan of action. Perhaps you can find someone to introduce you. Be able and ready to clearly articulate why you would like to work with this person in a mentoring relationship and what your goals would be. Also, be sure to have a copy of your up-to-date résumé handy that includes your LinkedIn profile URL.

    One note of caution—the busiest and most acclaimed individuals may not be the best choice for a mentor. They simply may not have the time or, perhaps, the inclination. High achievers also may be too focused on their own careers, or they may be too demanding or directive.

    4. You might be wondering why anyone would want to serve as a mentor. What do they get out of it? The answer is that they see value in the mentoring collaboration and know that it typically offers professional advantages for both of you. Experienced mentors have already learned from others. They remember how important mentors were to them, and they enjoy watching younger professionals develop. Many successful individuals simply want to give back.

    At the same time, mentoring is a mutual endeavor, and as a mentee, you have assets to bring to the partnership. First of all, you bring a different and newer viewpoint. You may be more familiar with recent research or perspectives, and you can help a mentor stay current. You may be aware of emerging cultural issues or have a better understanding of current multigenerational needs. You probably will be more sophisticated with technology. Good mentors will get as much as they give.

    5. There are several requirements for good mentoring relationships. These include safety, time, respect, and reciprocity. You want to be certain that the focus is on your professional development. If you ever feel that the mentoring has more to do with inappropriate issues, or seduction, or doing favors for the mentor, you will need to end the relationship.

    Time and respect on both your parts is required. If your mentor cancels meetings or simply isn’t available, the process can’t work. On the other hand, you must be committed and respectful of your mentor’s time and effort. It is your responsibility to keep in touch, suggest meeting times, and set specific goals for a mentoring session. The mentoring relationship can’t survive without good follow-through on your part.

    6. Mutual confidentiality and trust are critical components of the mentoring relationship. Frequently, the mentoring process covers difficult professional issues, and personally sensitive issues may, inadvertently, be disclosed. You don’t want your problems discussed with colleagues. Likewise, personal information you might learn about your mentor, or personal examples used by mentors, should not be disclosed to friends or co-workers.

    7. If the mentoring relationship isn’t working, or if it no longer meets your needs, you may have to ease out of it. There are well-established cues that the mentoring relationship is not ideal and should be terminated. Examples include the mentor asking for favors, suggesting joint ownership of your work product, being judgmental or too directive (and upset if you don’t take the advice offered), boundary issues, or a breach of confidentiality.

    There may also be a lack of focus or disrespect for your time. You may feel as if there is a hidden agenda. There may be generational or personal incompatibility, or a conflict of values or interest. One or both of you may feel disappointed or feel used, particularly if goals were not clear from the start.

    You should never be locked into a mentoring relationship. Like any termination process, the ending needs to be managed professionally. No matter what the reason for the termination, you should try to avoid burning any bridges if at all possible.

    8. There is no set time limit for a mentoring relationship. Some may be just a few months; others may go on for years. It is useful to establish evaluation guidelines and timelines when you begin. What generally happens is that, at some point, both the mentor and the mentee recognize that the goals of the mentoring process have changed or have been achieved. Perhaps you have accomplished your stated goals or reached a specific career milestone. If so, this should be reviewed and celebrated. In the best possible outcome, the mentoring relationship eventually transitions into a peer relationship. The relationship continues, but it has been restructured and updated, and it becomes one of professional collegiality.

    9. If you are lucky, as you advance in your career, you will have several outstanding mentors. They will support your efforts, encourage you, and provide professional advice and assistance as needed. Think of each one as a valuable resource. Be appreciative, and recognize their efforts whenever you can.

    10. One of the measures of a successful mentoring relationship is that you, the mentee, understand the importance of carrying on the mentorship tradition. Mentoring is not easy. In fact, many would argue that mentoring is a leadership competency that you need to develop. Others would tell you that mentoring is a privilege. It affords you the opportunity to give back to your profession and to honor the mentors you had along the way. Even as a new professional, you are in a position to help others succeed, so begin to give back as soon as you can. Start by offering to help others, even if only in small ways, and, eventually, you will be one of those mentors that others seek.

Resources

    For a free ebook on “Mentoring Matters,” go to: http://www.startsmartcareercenter.org

    For additional information on mentoring in social work, see “Becoming a Social Work Leader” at: http://www.socialworker.com/feature-articles/education--credentials/becoming-a-social-work-leader/

    The American Society of Association Executives (ASAE) provides tips and resources on finding and working with a mentor. See: https://www.asaecenter.org/search#?q=mentoring&page=1&sortBy=relevance&sortOrder=asc

    The Network for Social Work Management (NSWM) offers an International Mentorship Program for social workers in health and human services. See https://socialworkmanager.org for membership services or https://socialworkmanager.org/programs/international-mentoring/ for the mentorship program.

    Getting There: A Book of Mentors by Gillian Zoe Segal includes interviews with 30 leaders in diverse fields who provide insights about how they became successful. The publisher is Abrams Image (2015).

Dr. Elizabeth Clark was CEO of the National Association of Social Workers from 2001-2013. She currently is the President of the Start Smart Career Center.

Becky Corbett served as the COO of NASW from 2008 to 2013. She is now the President of BSCorbett Consulting and is a national speaker, trainer, and executive coach.